Hunter: I dismiss my Evard's Black Tentacles.


John: I charge the elf.


Tom: The elf ceases to be violated by tentacles and is instead violated by John's axe.

Hunter: ::rolls large handful of damage dice::  Aww... That's not nearly as much as I wanted.


Tom: You just blew somebody's arm off and you're complaining about it not being a critical hit!

Hunter: We can't stop here. This is Elf country...

Tom: The seneschal tells you "If you need anything, hit this statue with the tiny mallet to summon me," then leaves.


Karen: I'm going to hit it to see what it does.


Tom: First it begins screaming, then turns into a gnome who cries "I will fetch him!" and runs off.


Karen: Cool! I guess I should think of something to ask for when he gets back.

Tom: "I have a scheme long in the making, which I will now pretentiously monologue about..."

Tom: Are you going to loot the place?


Hunter: He's a giant. Does he have anything valuable that's small enough for us to carry off?


Tom: Maybe a silver spoon you could sharpen and use as an axe.


John: ...Al right, I'm going back in.

Hunter: :: sigh:: I guess I'll go save Gavin.

Tom: Really? Why?

Tom: "Do you also wish to make a deal for power?"

Gavin: "What will you give me for the souls of my family?"

Hunter:...

Karen:...

Dianne:...really dude?

Tom: "Don't go down the left path. That's Bobmagog, not Gogmagog."

Hunter: No, my patron  Gogmagog. This guy is Agragog.

Jason: He's the Gog of Agriculture.

Tom: Agra-Grog is the Gog of fermentation.

Tom: You're selling your soul for a giant chicken?!

Dianne: What mojo is this dwarf chick laying down that she gets away with murdering every suitor who tries to marry her?!

Hunter: She walks around topless with gems braided in her nipple hair.

Karen: Jesus, dude...

Hunter: You're right. That's an unrealistic expectation of beauty and we shouldn't glorify it.

Jason: What about the band? Are they still playing?

John: They've probably pulled battleaxes out of their tubas, knowing this crowd.

Tom: "Being me his head after the ceremony and I'll pay you it's weight in gold."

Gavin: I cast "Enlarge" on the head...

Tom: (moving enemies on the grid) These two don't like Jay, this one doesn't like Karen, and this one doesn't like Dianne.

John: And none of them like vegetables.

Hunter: "How did this guy smash your house to bits?"

Tom: "Henchmen. And some dogs."

Karen: "What kind of dogs?"

Hunter: Dire Pugs. Does it really matter?