November 16, 2013

Chris: Kick him in the ghost dick!
Amanda: Oh my God, dice!  Fuck you right in the face!
Eric: Well that was anticlimactic.  I didn't expect her to die when I shot her.

Chris: It's a bullet, dude.

Eric: I was just prepared for her to be a super voodoo lady.

Chris: Voodoo doesn't make you bulletproof.
Eli [As Dr. Frankenstein]: "Dr. Nash!  I've read your work!"

Chris: "Yeah, I... read about you in English class..."
Amanda: "Ace, where am I?"

Eli: "You are directly underneath the house where most of your friends died."

Amanda: "...I knew that much."

Eli: "Then why did you ask?"
Amanda: All right.  It's basement time.

Eli: It's where she keeps the dungeon.

Amanda: It's a fun-geon!
Amanda: It has to hurt or it won't heal.
Bryan: How many arrows do I have to put in this guy?  He's like a reverse Kerplunk tube; how many stick do I have to put in before the marbles all fall out?

November 14, 2013

Eric: "Be wary, travelers.  The souls of the Dead take this path to Lethurna, and predators have thus taken up residence along it."

Eli: "Don't they have to put signs up and go door to door to let people know?"

Chris: "Wrong type of predator, Fletcher..."
Eric: "There's a secret way, but you won't like it."

Tom: "Oh gods..."

Eric: "You'll have to go through the Shadowfell."

Tom: "Oh, good!  I thought sewers were going to be involved!"
Tom: "I'm buying a horse, because I can ride it and then when I get tired of it I can eat it."
Tom: One of these days I'm going to use that portal to find a universe with competent guards.
Eli: I need to buy Fletcher a Horn of Summons.  If Fletcher blows it, all creatures within a mile hear it and all allies immediately wake up if sleeping and know my exact location in relation to them, his current HP, and his status.

Tom: But will it make anyone care?

Eli: ...No.
Eli: So what did we loot?

Jason: A lot of art and wine.

Hunter: This is a vampire's castle; that's not wine.

Chris: Even the cigars are blood.

Eli: I thought they'd be orphan skin or something.

Tom: Scabs wrapped in orphan skin, maybe.
Eric: Your power list reads like a set list for a Norwegian Black Metal Band...
Tom" His horse isn't really gay, he's just been raping it this whole time.

Hunter: Took it just a little far there.

Tom: Neigh means neigh!
Eric: You only disable most of the traps.  Your conscripted minions will still have to deal with the rest.

Jason: Meh.  They're just gnolls.
Tom: [playing an evil character] "He's tricky, huh?  He wouldn't do something like infiltrate an adventuring group and pretend to be a hero so he could kill things and get gold, would he?"
Eric: The door opens to reveal four drow with readied crossbows pointed at you.

Tom: Good!  I want to kill one!