November 25, 2016

Hunter: And  is why you kill hags, not fuck them!
Tom: Let me get this straight. The wizard is going to seduce the hag?

Gavin: I'm helping.

Tom: You're making this a threesome?!

Gavin: Well, I'm turning into a wolf...

Hunter: How does adding bestiality to an already disgusting situation constitute HELPING?!
Finn: "Since no one else is asking the obvious, I will."

Tom: "Ask me what?"

Finn: (aside) What am I supposed to be asking again?
Tom: "My lieutenant will stay here. I will attend the feast."

Gavin: "Well you age to leave your weapons here to avoid violence?"

Hunter: Everyone's checking their weapons at the entrance! Why would he leave them here, miles away?
Tom: Do you want to impress them or just feed them at this feast?

Hunter: Why bother impressing them? We're just going to kill them and take their stuff later.

November 19, 2016

Hunter: Old Stoyanka tells you that you have three days to find the moss and return with it.  She will provide you with a guide as well as instructions on how much to collect and what dangers to expect in the morning.

Jay: Excellent! Is there a time limit on how long we have to get the moss and get back?

Hunter. Dude...
Hunter: Two of the Chasind Stalkers attack Jason's character.

Jason: Go ahead and rip me apart, then.

Hunter: To shreds, you say?
Gavin: I'm going to wade back across the river to get my horse.

Jason: NO! I'm already bringing your horse to you!

Patrick: I think you've lost your horse privileges for a while.

Hunter: You need to revoke his idea privileges instead.
John: Are the pieces of the cut ferry rope still attached on either side?

Hunter: Yes, they are still there.

Gavin: Okay, I can untie the section on my side and...

Hunter: You've made it across the river.

Gavin: Yes!

Hunter: Without your horse.

Gavin: Yes.

Hunter: And without bringing one end of a length of rope to help everyone else get across.

Gavin: Yes...

Hunter: So how did you going first help the party in any way?

Gavin: Uh...

November 13, 2016

Dianne: You can't gank your commanding officer on the first session!

Hunter: I'm not going to! I'm just PLANNING to!
Hunter: There are three horses still up, one of which is severely wounded.

Tom: Put that one out of its misery.

Karen: We have healers!

Tom: Fine! Use the primal forces of creation to keep the glue factory churning!
Hunter: Well, he's dead. And you have another horse.
Hunter: Karen?

Karen: My initiative is 5...

Jason: That's FIVE times your last initiative!

Karen:  ...Thanks.